Can a toddler have anxiety?

This is a question I hear often. Is it possible? Isn't that something that only adults have? Can a child so young experience anxiety?

Why? Why do we assume that anxiety is only for the grown minds? Would it not make sense for a child's mind to also experience anxiety? Maybe even more so than an adult? After all, they don't have the coping mechanisms we have as adults. It is much more difficult to reason with and explain what is going on to a toddler. It's not that they aren't smart. They are, they are so very smart but they just don't have that psychological development yet. They have not hit that part of life just yet.

I am having a hard time with friends while I deal with this. Either being talked down and treated like I'm overreacting (I offer you to try this for one day and let me know if you think it's an overreaction - I assure you when my best friend experienced it today she did not think my feelings were anything near an overreaction) or being told that they understand and get it. While I appreciate the sentiment it's just not accurate. They don't get it anymore than I get what it's like to have a husband leave for deployment, move around the country in the military, lose a child, go through a divorce, or live in a shelter with my child. I don't get that because I've never experienced it so I'm not going to pretend to get it. I will understand your right to your feelings but I cannot understand your feelings at all because, at the end of the day, I just haven't felt them.

Why am I posting about this? I'm not 100% sure to be honest. I feel like I'm doing it for a variety of reasons. I'm doing it because I'm hurting and I don't know what to do to help my daughter while I wait for our referral to see a specialist but I just need to get this off my chest, I'm doing it to help those around me fully understand what I am experiencing, and finally...I think I'm doing it so that the next parent struggling with a child with anxiety knows they are not alone. Because honestly, I feel alone. I work full-time and then I come home to my daughter. Like any mother does, I don't deserve a metal for that. But I see my friends getting together and enjoying time with each other and their kids and that hurts my heart. Because due to this anxiety it's hard for me to have friends around. They upset her. And in turn, it's hard for her to have friends. And my baby girl deserves friends. She doesn't deserve this life of us sitting at home in our bedroom because that keeps her anxiety at bay.

For two years I have put her needs before my own (well three really, if you include pregnancy) and I will continue to do so. However, I fear that I will be alone and never find someone. How can I when I know how she reacts with people..even when those people have been around her since she was born. What if I found someone and then she had anxiety every time she was around them? I feel selfish even thinking of putting her in a situation like that. If I were to find someone and that was her reaction to them then that would be it. I am her caregiver and could never knowingly put her in a situation where she is suffering from constant anxiety and crying.

So often we read and hear about dealing with a spouse who has anxiety issues. How to cope with that and how to survive it but we do not hear much about the life of a parent who has a child that suffers with anxiety. I hope that a fellow parent finds this and realizes they are not alone in this journey. There are others who experience it even though it's not talked about often.